The First Next Step

Seminary is over. Perhaps the most difficult part of the last few weeks has been accepting the fact that this chapter has concluded. I liked this chapter. Some chapters of books can stand alone as great works in and of themselves. I think of the “Grand Inquisitor” from Dostoyevsky’s novel The Brothers Karamazov. That chapter was Dostoyevsky’s dealing with his own lack of faith in a haunting and chilling way. It is brilliant and you can read that chapter without reading the whole book. But it, like any single chapter, is better in the context of the whole book. The seminary chapter of my life was great. I’d like to think it could serve as a stand alone story, but it is better in the context of the whole.

So, the question is…what’s the next chapter? I’ve been praying about the next chapter ever since I started the previous one. And the Lord, in His graciousness, has provided the first “next step” for us. In a few weeks time, our family will pack up and move to Freeport, Bahamas.

I have accepted an interim pastoral position at LucayaPresbyterian Church (EPC) in Freeport, Bahamas. We will be there at least through the end of August. They are currently searching for a full-time pastor and I will help them fill in the gap until the right man is found. This is a great opportunity for me to get some more experience preaching and beginning to exercise the gifts the Lord has given me. And while we would have made the same decision if the location had been in, say…Iowa (nothing against Iowa, Kevin Costner thinks it’s darn near “heavenly.”), it doesn’t hurt that the church is located mere miles from some of the most beautiful water in the world. Make no mistake, though, this is not a vacation, I’m there to work…but we’ll manage to find time for some fun too! I will be preaching weekly, leading a Bible Study and prayer meeting, and doing some pastoral visitation.

I do solicit your prayers. I’ve never preached on a weekly basis. It will be a totally different kind of work week for me. Please pray that God’s Word would fall on fertile ground (first in my heart and then in the hearts of the people) as I preach each week. But even before we begin this, we have to pack up our house in Orlando, say our goodbyes, and prepare to leave for several months. Leaving is always a difficult thing. We are made to live in time and space. We are made to occupy a particular place. One can’t help but develop roots in a place and every move requires those roots to be dug up. It is a bittersweet time. We are so excited for this next chapter. But starting this chapter means that the last one is done. We’re excited for the what lies ahead but we mourn what we’ll leave behind.

And we’ve only been given this first “next step.” We don’t know where the Lord will take us after our time in the Bahamas. We’ve applied with several churches. We trust the Lord that there is a church looking for us as we look for them. But we don’t yet know where that is. Again, we solicit your prayers. We are learning how to trust the Lord in new and exciting ways. That’s the positive way of saying that we are living in anxiety producing times. Like many lessons, however, experience is the best teacher. But all things being equal, I wish I could just read about it in a book. Thankfully, God is a good story-teller. He’s writing a great work in my life and I’m hopeful that this next chapter will outshine the previous one. 

The End is Just a Means to an End

So, this is it? I finished my last exam of my last class of my last semester of my last year of seminary. It is finished. To be honest, it was kind of anticlimactic. You’d like to hear sirens, bells, or whistles go off…but no such luck. I turned in my final and shook the Registrar’s hand. He whispered, “Congratulations.” I whispered back, “Thank you.” There you go. I’m done. I milled about the school for a little while, not really wanting to acknowledge that it was over.

I’m really going to miss that place. RTS has been really good to me. I’ve come to love the professors, administrators, and staff. I love the library. I love the bookstore. I love hanging out with all the other students. And I’ve done well there. I’ve received grades that far exceed my acquisition of knowledge (maybe I shouldn’t admit this until after graduation). I’ve been given great leadership opportunities. I’ve made connections with some of the brightest minds in the Church. But now it’s over.

I was walking toward the door to leave…and I couldn’t do it. I made a detour into the bookstore. I didn’t need to go into the bookstore, but I had to delay my walking out the door and finalizing the end of my student days at RTS.

Going into seminary I knew that it is a means and not an end. Seminary is path to be trod and not a destination. But I got comfortable there. Life was pretty good there. Why would I want to leave?

I’m struggling with the reality that the dominant metaphor of life is a pilgrimage. We are all pilgrims on a journey. In John Bunyan’s The Pilgrim’s Progress, the protagonist, Christian, is relieved of his burden of sin early in the book. The vast majority of the book is not about Christian’s need for forgiveness of sin. It is about Christian’s journey through this world to the world which is to come. While it would be easier for him to stop and live in one of the many places along the way, those are not his final destination. Those stops will never satisfy.

The vast majority of our lives is not about the removal of our sin. Don’t misunderstand, that is crucial and without it none of the other stuff happens. But the vast majority of our lives is a pilgrimage to the Holy City. We live in what is called the “Already and Not Yet.” We are already citizens of that city. We are already in Christ. We are already fully justified in Christ and adopted by the Father. But we are not yet in that city. We do not yet see things are they are. We look through a mirror darkly. We are not yet free of this body of sin. We are not yet glorified with new bodies. We do not yet have every tear wiped away by Jesus himself. We are already and not yet.

Kim and I came to seminary because we believe that the LORD has gifted and called me to shepherd his flock by pastoring in the local church. To stop at seminary because it is comfortable, because it is nice, because we’re happy is to miss the whole point. Similarly, to stop in my Christian life once I’ve experienced the forgiveness of sin is to miss the whole point. Yes, Jesus came to die for your sins…but there is so much more! There is a pilgrimage to be made. There is a greater goal than your personal happiness and well-being. There is the greatness of our God and His kingdom here on earth as it is in heaven! This is not the end.